Challenges in men and women relationships

Relationships between men and women

Relationships between men and women have a lot of challenges majorly due to their difference in communication patterns. Men mean what they speak about literally, while women apply dramatic and artistic language to express their feelings. In the two stories by Tagore, we get the difference in the relationships between men and women or girls. In the first story of Punishment, men treat the female gender with less respect and value. In the second story of Kabuliwala however, the relations between the girl and her father is friendly, and women’s opinions are respected. In support of the relationship seen in the second story between men and women, adherence to great virtues like respect and understanding helps sustain happy, stable relations. Muni’s father, therefore, handles his wife with understanding and patience, which is very good.

The fight between Dukhiram’s and Chidam’s wives

In the first story, the fight between Dukhiram’s and Chidam’s wives was not considered a significant bother. They went on with their works as usual despite that it disturbed them a bit, just like the neighbors who were used to the fights. The ignored the consequences of the battle and failed to settle the issues between the wives responsibly. The women are, therefore seen as of no importance in this story. On the other hand, Minis father treasured peace in his home and hence would prefer to listen to Minis endless talk without scolding her as her mother did at times. He understands his wife and daughter and keeps his family intact, which is an excellent show of responsibility.
Moreover, the blame on Chandara killing the elder wife, Radha, instead of Dukhiram taking his fault of murder in the punishment story is very unfair. Chidam argues that he can’t get his brother back but can look for another wife in case she got arrested and taken away from him, and this act shows how he has no value for his wife. Also, the lady chooses to admit that she murdered for the fear that he would walk out of her. Minis father, however, loves his wife and talks to her gently on issues that concerned them. He also values the happiness of his daughter, no matter what it took. He allows Kabuliwala to sit with her and share jokes because their friendship was strong and healthily beneficial to the daughter. The act of selflessness by the father is the ideal way to deal with relationships in families. It is vital that men and women/ girls are selfless in their relationships just as in this story.

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Men commanding women

Besides, the men in the first story harshly commanded the women in case they needed something done to them. Dukhiram demanded food when he came from work powerfully and ended up killing his wife due to anger. His lack of control over his rage and the ego he had led to a remorseful murder. Chidam locked his wife in their house after he realized that she went around speaking too much and threatened to break her bones if she went out. The men handled their anger by forcefully wanting things to go their way. In the Kabuliwala story, though, men preferred to understand what was going on first without reacting. Kabuliwala wanted to see Mini so severely after his release from the prison when the father told him that they had celebrations and he wasn’t welcomed, and he walked away without forcing it. It is a great way to deal with anger that most men, just like the ones in the first story, do no practice.

Relationships between the two men and their wives

It could also be noted in the first story the relationships between the two men and their wives were brittle whereas in the second story it was strong and close. The absence of food alone broke the relationship between Dukhiram and his wife. Furthermore, the urge of Chidam to save his brother makes him convenience his wife to take the blame on the death of Radha. The acts show how loose the relationships were and they could be broken easily by certain situations easily. The relationships in the Kabuliwala story, however, are strong and couldn’t break easily. Contrary to the expectation of Mini’s father that the friendship of Kabuliwala and his daughter would die when he was imprisoned, their friendship flourished all through. When he was released, he came back looking for Mini and brought her gifts just like before which shows that their friendship was strong and not even the imprisonment couldn’t break it.
Furthermore, the relations of men and women in the first story is unsteady while that in the second story is supportive. Radha talks back rudely to her husband about his provision of food hence provoking his temper. During the first times of their marriages, Chandara was a great wife to Chidam, and they were a suitable couple. She changed when she found it ominous for her husband to bring fewer earnings home and hence stressing him. The unsteady relations depicted when Chidam no longer wants his wife to confess that she murdered the elder wife. He wants the truth to be told, but it was too late for him. in the second story, muni gets a steady and supportive friendship from her father until the day she gets married. Kabuliwala maintains his relationship with Mini too and comes back to see her even after his prison release.
Therefore, some upheld virtues sustain great relationships in the second story, unlike in the punishment story. Men are generally responsible for a provision in the family and keeping peaceful relations with their ladies as depicted in the Kabuliwala story. Also, relationships ought to uphold fairness, and partners should be selfless in handling situations that might bring conflict. Furthermore, the supportive and steady connection between Mini and her father was healthy and enhanced her happiness. Kabuliwala love for Mini shows the result of love and care in fruitful relationships.


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